A Love Story (Three)

by Prabhavathi Jai

Till yesterday, you were in my eyes,
Today, you have haunted my heart,
From tomorrow, I will be walking with you,
Like the shadow in the light.

THREE

My mother called me and told , 

                    "Prabha, go to Chinthamani (Super market) 

and get all the items in the list.  
The list and the money is kept on the table.
The items are required for the pooja on Friday.   
Also, purchase some good camphor. 
Start immediately.  
If you go in the morning, there won't be much rush."
"No mummy, why can't you send Padmini. I have to read a lot."
"She has to do some house-hold work. You go now."

I started reluctantly.  

While making the purchase, I heard the familiar voice.  

My heart skipped a beat.

"Kala, Please give me urgently.  

one small pocket Surf.  

Two Margo soaps.  

one medium Close up paste. 

one pocket 7 'O clock blade.

Old Spice shaving cream one ............" 

The girl was obliging him with a smile.

"Jai, you, here?  Do you know the sales girl? 

You called her by name?"

"Yes, I know her. I come here often.  

If your billing is over, give it to me. 

I am a member and can get you some rebate. "
Jai paid the bill and  I got Rs. 80/- as rebate.

"OK, Prabha come we will take some coffee". We came out.
" Jai, I want ice-cream." (It was Jai ice-cream)
" Good, you take ice cream. 

I will have Vada and coffee. 

"Prabha,do you like it?"
" I like Jai."
   "What"

" I like 'Jai' ice cream".  We both laughed.

"Thank you, Jai"

Jai carried all the items in his Sports cycle and 

we proceeded to my house by walk.  

"OK, Prabha how your preparation for the
final Exam is going on?"

"Good in all subjects, except Maths"
        "Don't worry. You give your Maths book to me for a day or two"

After three days, he took me  to VOC park 
and handed over three 200-page full size note books .  

He has worked out systematically and
 neatly in his beautiful hand writing 

past 5 years  question papers step-by-step.
You  read and  work out all the problems.  

If you have any doubt or difficulty you note down. 

I will explain and make you understand. 

Now, you go to your college. 

Be sure, you will get good marks."

He had worked out all the problems step by step and giving
remarks and analogy.  It was very easy to understand.
I never seen mathematics this easy to score.

Jai had spent sleepless
nights to prepare the answer sheets for me. 

I met him again and got clarified my doubts. 

His explanations were straight and to my understanding. 

He was very patient and clear in his explaining.  

Whenever I took the note books, his face will appear
and encourage.  ( I scored 98% in the final).

He is my Jai, only  for me.

                         

                                                                  My jai has again scored the point 

                                                                                              (30-0)   Thirty-Love.

 *****

With the thoughts of  the person whom one loves,
after long separation when they meet unexpectedly,
the excitation is unmentionable. 
The happiness like heavy flood flowing 
breaking the river banks.

She finds reasons for continued union.
Let us see how the mathematics help them.
Prabha, she is very happy and has become
very possessive in telling,
"My Jai, only for me"
Beautiful young Girl !
And handsome youthful guy !

                                                                                     - pj

*

Nokkinaal nokki irainginaal agthu aval

yappinul attiya neer

                                               -Thirukkural : 1093.

She looked at me;

When I saw her seeing me,

with shy, she looked other way.

This action is like pouring water to

the growth of her love plant.

*

A Love Story (Two)

by Prabhavathi Jai

In love, it is joyful pleasure to meet
Also, it is painful pleasure to wait.

TWO

*

Search Results

 I narrated the incidence of mishap to Padmini, my elder sister.  

She asked me why I have done such a thing.

"He will be all right soon", she consoled me.
Next day my eyes were searching for him.
No, he was not there.
What happened to him? Whom to ask?
I was restless. I wanted to see and tell him
every thing and ask him to excuse me.
No, he did not turn up . How I played with the
 life of an innocent person.
What wrong he has done to me.
Then why I have played the mischief
without knowing the consequences.
Oh God, where is he?
Nothing should have happened to him.
Days went on......
one, two, three, four, five...... ten........fifteen .......
No, I could not see him.

Waiting for him !
 After long twenty days anxious wait, 
I saw him coming towards me limping his right leg. 
On seeing me, he felt shy and guilty
and crossed to the other side of the road with difficulty.

No, I could not tolerate any more. I rushed to him.
"How are you? All your problems because of me 
and my foolish action. I am very sorry.  
Please excuse me."

" No, no, I should have been more careful.  It is not your fault.' 
He absolved me from my guilty feeling. 

" I was more worried about you.
But I have seen you all right."  What a magnanimity !

" Now how do you feel? Is it paining? " 

"No,no, Doctor has told me I will be all right in a week" he smiled affectionately. 

He then asked me hesitantly," Your good name?"

" Prabhavathi. We live in the quarters opposite to your  College Hostel.
I am studying in the Women's College at Peelamedu. "

       "Very good. I am Jai studying in Engineering college, GCT.
OK. It is getting late. Reach home early.
I will practice some walking. It is long since I walked.
My friends used to take me to the college in their vehicle.
OK, Prabha, relax. Study well and take care. See you. Bye"

   After talking to Jai,  my heart  has become very light.
I was flying in Heaven with wings like a Fairy.
The sky full of stars and moon. 

Am I Fairy?

The gardens full of 
my favorite fragrant Jasmine and roses - to say,
I was feeling very happy.  I don't know why!?
Love birds singing.
Butterflies dancing and flying.

After reaching home, I washed myself, thanked God
and prayed for a long time. 
Seeing my long prayer my mother asked me,
" are you praying for your forthcoming Exam? Good. Good. " 

My elder sister, Padmini understood and winked her eyes.

I shook my head in the affirmative.
" I saw Jai to-day and talked to him" I whispered.

         " No harm to Jai. He is OK and will be better soon."
"Jai ?", Padmini smiled meaningfully.
I told her every thing.

                                                                                My Jai scored (15-0) 

                                                              Fifteen-Love

                                                                                                  .............contd.                                     *****

People often say, Love is blind,
But lovers, it is said, are also mad.
While in the grip of love, they behave like intoxicated people,
They themselves talk, laugh, weep, get anger and 
become emotional forming their separate own world.

What parents could not do for 20, 25 years, lovers achieve instantly.
He leaves smoking, drinking and other vices readily,
for the sake of love.
  Love is a great inspirational force, 
Kingdoms have been lost or gained.
Though generally, love is during adolescence, there is no age limit .

 Love is such a driving force, makes them very active and effective,
The body shows glow and shine with increased sex hormones.
For ladies, during separation, the skin turns pale and green.

Here, Prabha feels and repents for her unintentional action.
   Lovers do not tolerate any difficulty, trouble
or harm to the person whom they  love.
They quickly and readily react.
*
                                                                                              - pj
Kan kalavu kollum siru nokkam kamathil
Sem baagham andru perithu.                  
                                                 -Thirukkural : 1092.

 In love, her short stealing look is not 

the same and similar, 

                                 but with enlarged outlook.                                 

              *                 

A Love Story (One)

by Prabhavathi Jai

PYAR TO KIYA, 

 KOI CHORI  NAHIN
 PHIR  DARNA  KYUN  YEH DUNIYA SE 

(You have only made love,

not committed any theft,
 then why should you be afraid of the world.)

 *****

ONE

     Seen him and Loved him

Love at first sight 

 

WONDERFUL MONUMENT FOR LOVE

     Then I was studying in the Women's College at Peelamedu in 

Coimbatore.  As usual, that day I was returning home
from the college in the evening. I was walking down the
( Forest College  Museum) Cowley Brown Road
from Central Theater. He was coming in front me
along with his friends on the same side of the road.
I saw him making some funny gestures and
telling something to his friends.
 
I thought that he is teasing me and making fun of me.
I stared at him with anger. He stopped his gestures and
moved away with his innocence.  Suddenly, I remembered
that these boys daily go to the nearby private Gym.
It also struck to me that the boy was explaining to his friends
the method  of weight-lifting.  I misunderstood his action.
I smiled.  The boy just turned back and seen me smiling
without understanding anything.

After a few days, while returning from the college,
I saw him riding a bicycle and coming fast towards me.
God forbid me!  I don't know why the thought
 came to my mind. When he approached very near to me,
I suddenly moved across his cycle.  To avoid hitting me,
he had to ride over the stones heaped on the road side.
In the process, he lost the balance and had a bad fall
from the bicycle and fell on me knocking down my books
and lunch box.  But nothing has happened to me.

Stealing a look?

In a taunting way, I took the wooden scale 
in my hand and stared at him with projected anger. 

He was in a mixed feeling of
shock, shy, guilt and pain.

He slowly got up and gathered all my books and lunch box,
cleaned the dust and handed over to me with the words,

 " very sorry, excuse me. 

I should have been more careful while riding the bicycle. 

I was in a hurry. What happened to you ?

Are you all right ? Any wounds ? 
Can we go to the Hospital ?"
He was worrying more about me 
with tears hanging in his eyes.

People were gathering and scolding him.

      Then I saw his body full of bruises and bleeding heavily
on both of his knees and right foot.  He slowly lifted
his bicycle and went back to his Hostel. 
He was limping and unsteady.
Drops of blood  all over the road.

                            

Oh God ! What I have done?  It is my foolish action.

The boy's condition was very bad.  I stood there speechless and
action less for long. Tears rolled down my eyes.

 Oh God, the boy should be all right.
Nothing should have happened to him.
That night I could not sleep.

                                                          (0-0)    Love all

                                                                                ........   contd.
xxxxx

Generally, people (male or female) carry a mental picture
of the person of the opposite sex of  their liking,
When the features of the person they meet tallies
with those in their mind, it triggers immediately
 and develops an affection .
This is often described as Love at First Sight.

Here, the girl recklessly wanted to invite the boy's
attention and get sympathy and love by getting wounded.

                                                               But, the boy got badly injured.                                                                                              - prabhavathi jai

*****
Iru nokku ival unkan ullathu oru nokku
Noy nokku; onru an noy marundhu.     
                                                                                        - Thirukkural : 1091
Her beautiful eyes have two looks:
One look makes you sick;
Another, the medicine for the sickness.
*

PUKAR : Her Calling.

(The Agony of a Spirit)

When she was alive, I lost my sleep happily,
Even after her departure from the world,
I live without sleep, but sorrowfully and with tears. 

After finishing my day's work
I extend myself on the bed
and close my eyes in an attempt to sleep
and there immediately she comes.

Approaching sound of foot steps and appearing of
Shadow of a woman on the glass pans of the window
Her shrill familiar voice calling me
in the middle of every night :

"Oooooh! Come, my dear , come,
Come quickly, come to me.
I am waiting for you for long, come
Come without any more delay, come.

"I lived with the warmth of your body.
You liked my fairness and freshness.
You wanted me to dress like your queen.
Come and see me how I appear today.

"See, my condition in the hot sun in the day
Think of my position in the chilly wind in the night,
I am alone in the deserted place, I am afraid , my dear, come,
I am wandering here and there searching for you."
(sobbing)

"Whole day you attend others and care,
Don’t you have some time for me, my darling, come.
Further I can’t wait, come. In your eyes ,
I can always see the hanging tears, in my memory."
(weeping)

"In the late night, when you think of me,
The tears roll down like downpour of rain.
I sit very near to you, you are not able to see me.
I wipe your tears, you are not feeling.

I wanted to live happily with you for ever,
But, I had to leave you alone in the world and go.
Without me you suffer in the world,
I live the life of a spirit wandering here and there."
(sobbing)

"You never used to leave me hungry,
You fed me with food and happiness,
Now, I am hungry for long, see my condition,
Will you able to feed me with your hands?

Come, my dear, quickly come,
I am not able to leave you alone in this world and go.
The full moon is shining very bright,
Always, you liked to stay long with me then. Come."
(laughing)

"Come, my dear, quickly come,
Together, we lived happily for short,
I gave my heart to you,
Where you live for ever.

Your heart is already with me,
Leave your body and join me,
Our souls let them fly high and high,
Until we touch the never ending sky.

Your melodious music,
And my vibrant dance,
Let them produce a coherent mix,
And resonate in the whole universe."
(sound of jingling dancing foot Pads)

"Come, my dear, quickly come,
My wait is for long,
Your unbearable sorrow is more,
Come, come and join me.
And we happily proceed with our journey."

(I open the window doors.
And she turns and with extreme love, looks at me,
Throws a happy smile,
Expecting that I will follow her, she moves.

Sound of jingling foot steps slowly vanishing
and the shadow on the window disappearing,
to reappear again shortly.

But the God of death is merciless.
He is not taking my life and allowing me to join her.
Friend, then how to respond her call, Pukar?
and how to solve her agony of a helpless spirit ?)
*****

Undaar kan alladhu adu nara kamam pol

Kandaar makhizha seithal indru                

                                           -Thirukkural : 1090.

The liquor intoxicates only those who consume,

but she intoxicates all those who just look at her.

*

Thirsty fiend and deadly snake.

With best wishes, left like friend,
Appears returned like a fiend,
Thirsty of human blood?
Typical of your woman hood!

When I have given happily my heart,
You are entitled for the whole blood in it!
Drink and quench your thirst!
Then relax and calmly rest!

The blood of friendship,
Our love and relationship!
You know that I am an exorcist,
For such an act, I don't resist!

You parted like a friend in honest,
Returned like a full angry venomous serpent!
With your hood wide open and hissing you dance,
The venom sufficient for end of life, a strike only once!

My dear, you know that I don't fear!
I am a friendly snake charmer!
In my my garden deadly snakes come near,
kiss and play with me and say, 'my dear'!

The alphabets are as we just write,
 Judge the heart from letters ? no, it is not!
Take the Veena and the notes you calmly recite,
Your earlier thoughts and action will glow right and bright!

*****
Pinai yer mada nokkum, naanum udaiyaatku
Ani yevano yethila thanthu
                                               -Thirukkural:1089

With her innocence and shy like a doe,

what is the necessity for her to wear 

other outfits and jewelry ?

* 

Rainbow of Happiness.

The hanging dew drops scatter

early morning sun rays

and his convex heart-lens converge it

sharp to form on the sky

colorful rainbow carrying the words,

“ Oh, My dear,

Why the distance, come near. ”

  

perennial falls of happiness 

 See, the dark clouds gathering again

for incessant and heavy rain

the high falls jumps down the green meadows,

 where steady stream of happiness bubbles and overflows,

the colorful birds fly singing merrily,

peacocks spread the feathers dancing joyfully,

the white swans practice walking on your foot steps,

and with unknown feeling of excitement

the golden fawns jump high in the air to their content.

                                                                            

 

  the fairy descended on earth!?

      In the blooming garden,

sitting under the green mango tree,

like a glowing fairy descended on earth,

as you anxiously wait for him,

with the magic smile, here he comes.

No more waiting, you happily land in his lap,

And clasp him close, even for the air to pass no gap.

As the cool breeze sweep,

heart synchronization you keep.

 

no more waiting !

 In his loving embrace,

you close your eyes,

and feel with pineal sense

the limbic resonance.

With pleasure as the souls meet,

opens the heavens gate.

  happy with koya hua dil !?
The heart light like a flying kite

and the joy touches Himalayan height!

You gasp and slowly whisper,

"woh tum hi ho ! Mere pyare dil ke chor!"

The dream coming real and true,

with shy and smile you say,

“I knew, it is you and only you!

0n nudhar ko-oo udainthathe gnatpinul
nan naarum udkum en peedu
                                    -Thirukkural:1088.
My might and valour, fearful to the enemy in the war field,
got defeated once I see her beautiful forehead.
*

He, She and.........

HE, SHE AND...........

(Third sex)  

 

Kurukshetr. 
Fierce battle between Pandavas and Kauravas was raging 
and it was under deciding phase.
It was told for a sure win, an human sacrifice was required.
Whoever sacrifices the human life, they will win the battle.
In consultation with Lord Krishna, who was staying in the 
battle field as Arjun's chariot driver, Aravan was selected as
the human sacrifice. Aravan also agreed gladly for
being the human sacrifice. But he had one request
to make to Lord Krishna. Before sacrificing himself,
Aravan desired married life for a night and enjoy the 
sexual pleasure. But who will marry the person in such
condition. Nobody came forward.

In these odd prevailing condition, Lord Krishna himself takes
the Avtar as Mohini, a beautiful lady. The marriage between
Aravan and Mohini was solemnised in the battle field. 
Aravan ties the Mangal Sutra, sacred thread to Mohini,
decorated with all ornaments and glass bangles.
For that night, Aravan enjoys the newly wedded life with Mohini.
Next day, Aravan was ceremoniously sacrificed in the battle field.
Mohini mourns the death of Aravan.
Her Mangal Sutra was cut and the glass bangles in her arms
were broken. She becomes a widow.

In every year this epic is re-enacted in Koovagam in Tamilnadu.
The temple is called Koothandavar temple and people come
here from all over India and even from foreign countries.
They who participate in the ceremonies are called,
Aravanis, Aravan's wifes.
See here Lord Krishna's role. Being a male, he assumes 
a female role. Similarly, so called eunuchs, hijras or Aravanis
attain female characteristics. They are born males with female
characteristics. This may be due to natural biological reasons
or forced physical reasons.

Not only Lord Shiva, all humans as such are dualistic in nature.
Arthanariswaras, half male and other half female.
Not only in depiction an in truth and facts.
They contain both male and female characteristics.
But according to chromosomal combination and genetic
dictates, one characteristic dominates as male or female.

In children this is dormant and not predominant. When they are in
the ages of Adolescence just before puberty, the gonads, sex glands
start functioning. Then the problem the evident. 
In male the female hormones, estrogen, abundants and in female the
male hormones, testosterone. Accordingly the characters develops and 
perpetuates. The apparent males feel shy of males and females
feel shy of female and they are comfortable with oppsite sex.
They like transgender appearance and cross dressing and make ups.
This is genetic aberration or variation.

At this stage hormonal therapies and medical and surgical 
reassignment processes are available for them for rehabilitation.

The society does not approve them and reject their behaviour
and condemn them. Their parents themselves feel shy in society,
and they are in dilemma. They don't know what to do. Such  transgender
children are psychologically forced to leave their home by differentiation,
unkind comments and harassments.

The society till their end never accepts them for lack of individual self and
sex identity. Where to accommodate them in male or female category.
No jobs are offered to them, even by Government.
Their cognitive and mental ability was found to be good or even better
than normal persons. And they do not lack any physical ability.
They can perform any functions requiring mental and physical ability.

They are forced to such an mental agony, they are forced to beat
 dead bodies of such persons with chappals by the community, crying
"Oh God don't give such state in our rebirth."

In his Psychoanalytic theory, Freud has described the "penis envy".
In which the females envy the male penis , the much importance to
the organ. But in the transgender attainment males sacrifice their
penis at the altar of Goddess. It is cruel and secretive act of mutilation 
of sexual organ by enoch doctors. This cult  known as 
"Yellamma cult" is prevalent in Karnataka and Maharashtra.

Without any job these people involve themselves in begging,
petty crimes and homosexual activities. Awareness has dawn
among these people. Their demand for decent life  
and acceptance by the society is loud.
Some of the state govts. has considered their demands 
sympathetically. Issue of ration cards, provision of govt. jobs
to these people has been done.

It is considered that they are from Lord Krisna and they gather in group,
sing , dance and bless, when they learn about the birth of a child
and demand more money if the child is male. People also
give happily.

These people are co-human beings and they desire our 
 acceptance and dignity. When we do consider animals and birds 
with such an outlook, Why not our co-humans. 
They deserve.

Supreme court of India has finally approved their status

and directed the governments to provide all welfare 

and safe-guard measures for them.

Today (13-5-2014) evening, is the symbolic marriage day of

eunuchs assembled all over from India and abroad at

Koovagam, in Tamilnadu.

And tomorrow, they break their Mangal Sutr and bangles 

weeping and wailing.

We fought for their case six or seven years back

and today, they are approved human beings in India

with respect and honor. 

*****

            Pic: From Google Images